The disadvantages, advantages, and tips to manage an early marriage.
The downside of marriage at an early age:
- Statistically, couples who get married early are likely to get divorced than couples who get married during the late 20s and early 30s. It is financially, mentally, emotionally, and physically difficult to run a family at a young age.
- Young couples lack parenting advice and they are not matured enough to handle problems.
- Their peers cannot advise them on marriage topics and they are mostly left out from their peer group. People who get married early live different lives from their peers. While they are busy with taking care of a family, their peers go to university to get a degree, or they go around the city looking for jobs.
- The early 20s can be a time when we learn skills and attain knowledge that can be used at a later age. Young married couples fail to do such things and they are financially challenged.
- Emotional maturity is developed as we grow older. We experience a myriad of emotions and be become better at controlling them. We can control a fireball of anger or we can chain our hands, put a silencer on our lips to control our rage. Partners who get married at a young age are mostly emotionally immature and fights are evident in their relationship. There can a burst of anger and frustrations when their emotions overwhelm them. This can lead to arguments, fights, and divorce.
- The health of young women begins to deteriorate significantly after they give birth to babies. Their bodies are mostly not strong enough to give birth. Giving birth at an early age can drain away a young mother’s life and energy. Sometimes they even die giving birth to babies. In addition to physical anguish, they become depressed and stressed. It also impacts their emotional health.
- Couples who get married early carries more weight on their shoulder at a young age. They face hardships the same way adults do; young couples who get married invites a lot of problems in their life- a little too early. Sometimes they regret not living the life of the 20s to the fullest.
- It is more difficult to manage a family at a young age. A young mother and father are not equipped with good parenting skills and decision-making. Child care is not taught to the young mother. Thus, problems arise while taking responsibility for their child.
- More household work is brought into their daily life and the once romantic couple fades into an unglamorous broken couple. The quality time they share decreases as they engage more in their busy schedule. Young couples have to learn time management and help each other in the household chores to ease their living. In a relationship where both the partner has a job, a lazy spouse means more fights at home.
- Most girls cannot attain higher education. They are left with taking care of the household more often. Most couples also regret not living a free independent life before marriage. But this is not wholly true as sometimes a girl can pursue further studies after she gets married. They wait to start a family until the girl completes her education. In most of these cases, the husband already has a job and he helps in taking care of his wife’s education.
Tips to manage an early marriage:
Falling into this pitfall is common but some couples manage to avoid all the downside of early marriage with maturity. Some couples live happily after getting married in the early 20s with their spouse while some fail to do so. From my observation couples who succeed are more matured.
- Planning the future with spouses instead of being impulsive can lead to a happy marriage and minimize the risk of getting divorced. Planning can be with- when to have kids, financial income, what to buy, where to live, etc. If couples are not ready to live together, they can wait and plan the perfect marriage at the perfect time.
- A study found out that kids of young and teen mothers were dropped out of school at an early age. A good plan can avoid this and also minimize the load coming too early in life. Sending kids to school can be a problem for many parents. Couples should have financial capability once they start a family.
- Young couples should wait until they are not financially challenged and they should keep a check on the wife’s health. Couples should not start a family too early but with proper planning. There is still time to start a family if you are still in the early 20s.
- Some couples have kids and they still live happily because they make a proper plan with their financial condition. Health conditions vary from individual to individual and couples should discuss them with their partner. Experts opine that the best age to conceive a child in the late 20s and the early 30s.
- Emotionally mature couples handle their emotions and anger better and avoid unnecessary fights. They are more empathetic and caring. They solve their conflicts with maturity and experience. Compromise is crucial between young spouses as they begin to live together.
- In a healthy relationship, responsibilities are shared and there is “we” in everything they do. Sharing responsibilities and helping with chores are crucial.
Advantages of early marriage:
- We get to live and marry the person we love without waiting for years. Though there might be some sacrifices we have to make on the way, getting married at an early age is worth it if the relationship is strong and matured.
- Couples can grow and develop together from a young age till old age. There are lots of things to explore once they venture into a new married life. Young couples can create lots of memories together as their life still has a long way to go.
- Married couples are also found to be less afraid of failure.
- Loneliness is experienced mostly during the early 20s but life is fun and easy when we have a companion that sticks to us wherever we go.
As the saying goes, “Age is just a number”, some people mature quickly and better handles any situation life throws at them. Perhaps, age is not a factor for a happy marriage but it is with maturity and the power of love.